Idled by Cancer Cure, Researchers Grope for Purpose

Idled by Cancer Cure, Researchers Grope for Purpose
Image [CC] jacqueline

I guess I missed the news. Surely there’s been a spate of headlines about the discovery of a cure for cancer? For Autism? Alzheimer’s? For male pattern baldness? No? Then for goodness sake, why are researchers working to suss out whether pistachio nuts might provide a decaffeinated alternative to coffee? Indeed, having learned nothing from prior efforts to substitute roasted coffee with acorns, beetroot, chicory, malted barley, cottonseeds, dandelion root, figs, potato peels, and toast scrapings – no, I’m not making this up – researchers now claim that:

” …carefully roasted, the fruit of the Pistacia terebinthus tree, which is much smaller than normal pistachios, could offer all the flavour of coffee, with none of the kick – as well as being significantly cheaper.

“It might seem an unlikely boast, as the special type of pistachio nut is from a tree better known as having sap which is a source of turpentine.”

Turpentine, yum.

Let’s be clear: there are countless maladies in want of a cure. We have climate problems. Food source problems.1  Economic problems aplenty. And for cryin’ out loud, we’re desperately close to losing Terry Pratchett to Alzheimer’s — can we please try to focus on what’s important?


Notes and Links

  1. That’s food — as in something that provides nourishment, not some fool substitute for product that’s just terrific already, thanks.

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