Bloggle

It’s funny… For a long time I thought about sitting down and writing some fiction. And while I was thinking about it, I picked up a number of books about writing. You know… a small library of them. Now that I’m no longer thinking about writing fiction, but actually doing it, well… those books — most of ‘em anyway — strike me as a little hollow. There’s only two of them, really, that I can flip through today and say with confidence, “this is something useful.”

The first of these — Conflict, Action & Suspense, by William Noble — proved to be an eminently practical and useful “how-to” sort of book. I’m pretty certain there’s nothing in this book that isn’t ably covered by your standard college-level “Creative Writing 101″ course… then again, I haven’t had that course.

The second is On Writing by Stephen King… which is really not a how-to book at all; it’s a bit of an attitude adjustment for those who think they might want to put some words on a page, and a gift, really, for those who will.

And a third is mostly for fun. Mind you, it’s chock full of good stuff on the business of writing, but John Scalzi’s irascible, sometimes caustic collection of essays, You’re Not Fooling Anyone When You Take Your Laptop to a Coffee Shop is largely Scalzi just, well… being Scalzi, through and through.

I can say with certainty that none of these books will help me write the Great American Novel. Quite the opposite; between them I’ve figured out that I don’t want to write the Great American Novel… I want to tell a wicked good story.

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In a coffee shop, and with her infant daughter snoozing at her elbow, a single mom — recently divorced, and struggling to make ends meet — writes a story about a boy wizard and an enchanted school. She writes in a coffee shop not for inspiration, but because she doesn’t have money enough to heat her apartment. Her story, of course, the book Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone; the single mom, JK Rowling. I’m given to understand both mom and daughter are doing rather well, these days.

Rowling wasn’t the first author to take to the local coffee house — whether for warmth, or inspiration. Voltaire was an early coffee house patron, and he’s said to have tossed back between 50 and 72 cups a day (straying closer than most of us would dare to a lethal dose of caffeine) while writing works such as his fittingly frenzied Candide and Merope and his scathing Letters on the English.

It was a coffee house called Tillyard’s that was the unofficial home of The Royal Society — a clubby bunch who lunched and drank coffee and argued about alchemy — and ultimately published the collected works of their chair, one Isaac Newton. And in Austria you may be hard-pressed to find a coffee house that *doesn’t* boast of an author, poet or playwright who sat at that very table.

Given what passes for coffee house culture today, however, it’s remarkable that Rowling was able to pen a paragraph or two, much less a book empire. For all the lofty talk of the Third Place your chances of finding a Great, Good Place to write the Great American Novel are anything *but* great.¹

John Scalzi skewered most any remaining romantic notions of coffee house writing in his 250-page epic snark — and one of my favorite reads of the year — You’re Not Fooling Anyone When You Take Your Laptop to a Coffee Shop. And a clip from an episode of Family Guy making the rounds on YouTube doesn’t offer much hope, either. Still, you can’t keep folks from trying…

Of the countless coffee shops I’ve visited, I could probably count those that offered a viable third place on one hand. Which is a shame… and probably a factor of economics. Hard chairs, small tables and surfaces that echo (echo, echo…) tend to get customers in and out the door quickly. So maybe I’m not going to write my novel in a coffee shop. I can deal with that. But shouldn’t I be able to have a conversation?

What’s coffee house culture like in your corner of the world? Got a Great Good Place to share?

Notes and Links

1. Yeah, I know… the article talks about coffee shops in Scotland, and I reference the Great American Novel. I’m a fan of cognitive dissonance. ↩

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Not so long ago I’d written here of John Scalzi’s (then) latest opus — You’re Not Fooling Anyone When You Take Your Laptop to a Coffeeshop: Scalzi on Writing — and in so doing pined for a copy of mine very own. (Not to worry, I managed to get my mitts on a copy of the coveted limited edition.) (more…)

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When I’m not writing, I read. Voraciously. Eclectically. And of late, I frequently read about writing.

I recently discovered John Scalzi’s books — The Android’s Dream, The Ghost Brigades, Old Man’s War — and already I’m a fan. I learn today that Scalzi has a blog, in which he rambles forth on writing and such. Happiness. I also learn today that he’s just finished a book — on writing — deliciously titled, You’re Not Fooling Anyone When You Take Your Laptop to a Coffeeshop: Scalzi on Writing. And only moments later I discover that it’s a tiny, limited edition printing, and it’s already sold out… apparently only just a few minutes before I’d glommed onto the whole thing.

Bummer.

Er, in the off chance that *you* might have purchased two copies and need only one… drop me a line, eh?

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